Archive → April, 2008
Medical Slang
Learn the lingo kids:
404 error: missing file/document/CAT scan etc
Goomer/ C&Ts/Cabbages and turnips: Comatosed patients
Rear Admiral: Procotolgist, ass doctor,
ALP (ACUTE LEAD POISONING) Gun Shot Wound
Ass Grapes: Hemorriods, the kind that tend to hang out.
C in C (Crack in Crack): Anal Fissure (more on that later)
Bordeux: Blood stained Urine
AGMI: Ain’t Gonna Make it
AHF: Acute Hissy Fit
HYS: Hystrical
APTFRAN: Apply pillow to face, repeat as needed.
ATS: Acute thespian syndrome (faking it)
B-52: 5mg Haldol + 2mg Ativan (yisda7 feel)
Baby Catcher/ Stork Whisperer: Obs and Gynea Specialist (baby/mommy doctor)
BBCs: Bumps, Bruises and Cuts.(i.e. nothing serious)
Pecker Checker: Urologists- usually specialising in STDs or STIs
Jock/QB/Blade: Surgeon
Gas man, Gas Jocky, Gaswallah: Aneasthetist
Cath Jocky: Cardiologist
BMW: Bitch Moan and Whine
Brothel Sprouts: Genital Warts
Calling Doctor Blue = I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with him
Celestial Discharge: Dead
CHAOS: Chronic Hurts All over Syndrome
Chocolate Hostage: Constipation
Cockoo= CCU= Cardiac Care Unit
Dilligaf (“dillygaf”): Do I look Like I Give a Fuck.
DPS: Droppy Penis Syndrome.
ELFs: Evil Little Fuckers= Annoying Kids
FABIANS: Felt Awful But I’m Alright Now Syndrome.
The Sad fact is that I’ve yet to use any of these terms in Kuwait …. it’ll only add to the chaos and turmoil.
Top Ten Medical blogs [2007]
“
John Crippins commentry on the faltering goliath that is the NHS. A most read for any doctors in the UK
2. The Psychiatrist Blog
Dr Michelle Tempest; she provides interesting food for thought despite her Tory touting.
3) Dr Grumble
Very well written articles, updated frequently.
Chronicles of a GP in England…… I didn’t like it but the site I stole this list from did.
5) Hospital Phoenix
Was very good at giving an anonymous but personal account during the MMC disaster. now dead. (the blog not the doctor).
6) Dr Rant
This is written by a team of people and is like House, MD only even better.
7) Fat Doctor
This is an American [=big,fat, married] blogging physician.
The Ferret Fancier
“Done some really good undercover reporting”
It’s the same article over and over and over again !!
9) The Junior Doctor
Gives a personal account of life as a junior doctor
10) Of Short White Coats and Stethoscopes
Gives a personal account of life as a medical student.
“
Huzzah ! I now have 3 posts and 200 hits ! Life is good !
Another day in paradise……
“Meh …. blogs aren’t really my thing …. I’m just not self centered enough to make it interesting”
Those were my exact words nearly a year ago when I first got to Kuwait.
I now work in a hospital and have very little to look forward to these days and so it begins ….*
[puke] my very own blog [/puke]
Most posts will be based around the desolate wasteland that is the Kuwaiti health care system; others will include various aspects of my complete dissatisfaction with my current working environment. Oh and DON’T EVEN THINK OF ASKING ME ANY HEALTH CARE RELATED CRAP; EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME KNOWS I’M NOT THE GUY YOU ASK ABOUT WHY YOU GET ACNE, ARE FAT OR YOUR [insert bed bound 90 year old relative here] CAN’T BE CURED OF DIABETES, HYPERTENSION, A STROKE, OR SMOKING.
(and yes; I lifted that picture from here )
*I know there are 2 ands in the that sentence.Live with it; grammar just doesn't work on teh interweb.
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