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Medical Slang II

Apologies, this week has been too fucked up to write about, so here is part 2 of this post. I tried to use the first one (hat trick) a number of times but no one seems to get it……..

Hat Trick:Patient with three tubes in him, one in his pee pee (for urine) one in his nose (to drain fluid from his stomach) and one in his vein. Usually as part of trauma management; rarely done with any effeciency in this country.

Hi Fives: HIV Positive Patients

NARS: Not Another Rocket Scientist (usually a dumb newb)

OFIG: One foot in the Grave

P4P: Penicillin 4 a Prick (antibiotics for an STD)

PEP : Pharmaceutically Enhanced Personality: High or Stoned

PITA: Pain in the ass

RBG: Recieved by God

Roach, Road Pizza, Road Chilli, Toasted Goomer: A patient who barely survives after a massive usually crushing trauma.

Silver Goose/Silver Stallion: procotscope/ass camera.

TARFU: Things are Really fucked Up.

Secret Handshake: Rectal Exam

SBI: Something Bad inside = CANCER !!!!!

HBC: hit by Car

Teriyaki special: A really bad infection of the skin. Usually producing a texture similar to teriyaki beef/chicken (necrotising faciatis)

Blamestorming: Trying to find a scapegoat for the unit/teams fuck-up.

Pumpikin Positive: A dumb patient (with a hollow head)

Disco biscuits: Idiots who have taken ecstasy without drinking water and have ended up coming in because of dehydration.

TTFO: Told to fuck off (imsarif il mareeth) – an art form in and of itself… believe me.

Jack Bauer: A doctor who has been up and running for 24 hours.

Kaiser Soze: A disappearing Colleague = slacker.

P.S. A shout out to demon who has been missed over the last number of posts.

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